Saturday, January 06, 2007

Blue Day Worries

I've been training for my new job, so I haven't had a lot of time to write. The training had been going pretty well until Friday. On the last day that my teacher was to be with me, I just could not think clearly at all. I had to ask her to instruct me again how to do things that we had already gone over. It felt like my brain had turned into mud. Today, I'm feeling really down, and I don't want to do anything. I'm concerned that I might not be able to perform the functions of the job. That makes me anxious.

I hate depression. It takes all of the color out of the world. You just feel so empty, and there's nothing to fill the void. I've been putting off writing until this weekend, but now I don't feel motivated. A cave is beginning to sound good to me. Someplace to retreat and lick my mental wounds.

Well, I'm sorry, but this is all that I have the energy for. Those of you who struggle with depressive disorders will understand.

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