Taking Life Too Seriously

I've never been accused of taking life too seriously. My high school teachers thought that I didn't take it seriously enough. I DO have a sense of humor. Sometimes it's just buried under the depression.

I'm starting a new job today (more later), so I just wanted to share with you some of my favorite words of wisdom.

For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously

01-Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

02-On the other hand, you have different fingers.

03-A day without sunshine is like...night.

04-I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges?

05-Eagles may soar, but turtles don't sucked into jet engines.

06-I intend to life forever. So far, so good.

07-My mind is like a steel trap. Rusty and illegal in 37 states.

08-Support bacteria. They are the only culture some people have.

09-If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you even tried.

10-Experience is something that you don't get until just after you need it.

11-Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

12-The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.

13-A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

14-Get a new car for your spouse. It will be a great trade.

15-If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.

16-He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Have a wonderful day, and if you can't, have a day anyway.

["I'm so low I could do a ten minute freefall off the edge of a dime."]